Learning to be a father, a Lifelong series of lessons
NObody is born a sportsman, academic, a musician. We go to schools, get lessons, read and examined through notes, and have practices, where we hone our skills.
Years ago, I read of father training in Hong Kong. It seemed like an absurd idea. I brushed it off. Why aren’t there mother training? What do they hope to accomplish?
Because my job deals with children and parents, colleagues start passing me books. Power of a praying parent. I know how to pray. Why do I need to read this? It was dumped away in a corner. A year later, I found the book and thought, why not? A christian mother wrote of the millions of things she was worried about, until she decided to pray and leave it to God’s hands.
Today, I firmly believed in hybrid of experiential learning and inferential learning.
Experiential learning is learning from experience. You plan things, you try it out. May need to reward some, may need to punish some. It takes time, patience and alot of love.Some other fathers have faced similiar problems before. They could share the experience.
Inferential learning is learning through inference.The following are some books I read and follow some:
1. Lawrence E. Shapiro
2.Power of a praying parent
3.What woman wished their husband will know
4. Gary CHapman 5 Languages of Love
2. Mediated Learning Experience (MLE)
3. Positive Parenting Experience (PPP aka Triple P)
4. Duranho Father School
Just as the SAS believed that there is never a perfectly trained soldier, I believed there are many continuing studies about safety, hygiene, there are also different dynamics and preferences of children in intellectual, emotional, safety, and things are different when in childhood, teenage and youth, adult. So, how much more years of learning. Never ending.
Shalom and cheers people.